Before anyone says anything about this post, yeah, I already posted about a cereal before and Corn Pops isn’t that special. It is a regular Kellogg’s brand cereal that has been around for decades. Well, according to Yahoo! Finance, Wall St. publishes a yearly list of brands that will disappear in the coming year. In addition to future non-existent large names such as Myspace, Sears, and Nokia, a big one that caught my attention is Corn Pops.
Apparently, other cereals such as Frosted Flakes and Fruit Loops usually pull in around $200 million a year, while Corn Pops currently earns about $70 million a year. Their profits have dropped because many people are concerned about eating healthy, especially with the obesity issue in the U.S. I guess it makes sense with all of the helicopter parenting going around that children can’t have sugary cereal and watch violent cartoons on Saturday morning anymore. I used to do that and I’m not obese and never been charged with a felony. At least not a felony.
I have eaten Pops on and off for most of my life, probably because it was one of the cereals that would go on sale several times a year and I have always enjoyed them. In fact, this was the cereal where my mom decided to introduce me to the worm cereal story. I believe that she used it to teach me a life story about conservation, but I think she deserves at least an E for effort.
I remember that it was in the 80’s and I just started to eat a bowl of Corn Pops. My mother was complaining about having to many cereal boxes open without finishing them one at a time. I asked her why and she started telling me this cereal parable. I’m paraphrasing this of course.
There was this boy who used to eat all of his cereals at the same time. He would open a new box without finishing the others and would continuously do this. One day, he decided to eat from one of the older cereals and poured himself a bowl. The cereal had worms crawling in it because the cereal was too old. Worms! The lesson is to eat one box of cereal at a time.
Why would she tell this crazy story to a child, especially to one who is eating cereal at the time? As you can expect, I was afraid to continue eating my Pops. I was asking questions like why there were tiny holes in the cereal pieces. Were there worms in them? Did the worms eat some of the cereal? My mom then stated that she should have never told me the story. No kidding.
Eventually I got over my worm issues and went back to eating Pops. But sale prices was not the only reason why I would have them. As a reader of my blog would know, I watched a lot of TV as a child and advertisements would be very effective on me. I accept childhood branding and glad to state that Kellogg’s played a large influence on me. I remember many Corn Pops commercials and I want to share some here.
80’s Corn Pop Commercial
I barely remember this one but it is extremely 80’s. It’s almost like an Extra gum commercial. I don’t like the way the kid slams the spoon into her mouth so quickly. I could imagine all the kids who watched this commercial emulating it and getting dollars from the tooth fairy the next morning.
What’s really cool about the commercial is the advertised toy inside. First, kudos for putting the toy in the advertisement. The media would have a shit storm if McDonalds advertised their Happy Meal toys in this day and age. Nobody likes child branding anymore. Either reality sucks more and more as I get older, or I’m just turning into an old fogey. Or both.
Second, I forgot about those wacky wall walkers. I used to get them all the time as a kid. It was always fun to see that crazy octopus crawl down the wall. What sucked about them was their life span. They would get dirty and stop working quickly. There would be dust, dirt, pubes, food, and anything else that could stick onto them. Washing them kinda helped but it didn’t work the same. I have to see if they’re still being sold so I can throw them against the wall and confuse my son with their wackiness.
Corn Pops Commercial 1989
This is the commercial in which I still remember most of the lyrics. It’s an upbeat song tied to a story where the kid is jonesing for Pops so much that he sees them everywhere throughout the day. I would hate to say that the kid has a mental disease, but he probably won’t be passing any future psyche tests.
Anyway, sometimes I’d find myself singing this song when I see Pops in the cereal isle, which makes my wife give me the weirdo eye. I can’t blame her though. How many others would know some obscure commercial tune that’s over twenty years old?
Gotta have my Pops campaign
This concept started in the 80’s and went deep into the next decade. The idea was that the main character really wanted Pops and was unable to get any. A music theme comes on that is similar to Jaws and the kid would go to the brink of insanity while playing like everything’s cool. Finally they were able to obtain some Pops in the end.
I’ve noticed that these commercials and the Corn Pops Poppin ad would have the kids fiend for the cereal as if it was some sort of crazy sugar addiction. I’m really surprised that the kids don’t start sweating, fidgeting, and scratching their neck. Why does Corn Pops think jonesing for anything is funny, especially with the War on Drugs in full swing? I dunno, maybe Pops had a hand in the 80’s crack/cocaine epidemic.
Pure 100% Columbian Cut (sugar)
This final commercial uses the 24/7 news channel format when talking about a monster who is eating Corn Pops citizens. The monster footage is filmed in a Cloverleaf style. I like this commercial because it’s silly and almost seems like it could be something from the 80’s. It makes me think that the people who thought this up were children of the 80’s as well. I could see a NES commercial following this one. Maybe this generation isn’t doomed as I thought it was going to be.
But maybe it is. I’ve just read that people are eating less cereals and eating more things on the run, such as bagels and the like. Where is everyone going when they have to eat on the run? God forbid one has to buy a strange electrical device that makes a sound similar to an alarm in order to wake up a few minutes earlier. But I don’t want to sound bitter though. I can understand why people care about junk like protein, fiber, and the like.
Eh, things change and I have to get with the program. It’s just kinda sad to see a staple like Corn Pops possibly disappear. I knew I had to write about it when I found out and I’m glad the internet exists to keep memories of things like this fresh.
Time to stock up!