Thanksgiving Dinner

Yeah I know, it’s already two days into December and Thanksgiving is a blip in everyone’s consciousness right now. But hey, it was only a week ago and I spent a good amount of time working on this post. I would’ve posted it sooner, but life got in the way. So, I took this post and polished it up (half-assed) to get it ready for the blog. I really like Thanksgiving and if I’m still working on this blog by next year, I may post lots of special articles next November.

On with the show!

Thanksgiving is a well practiced American Tradition that has been celebrated ever since Abraham Lincoln declared it a national holiday. It is a day to be thankful and to spend it with the ones you love. But lets face it, everyone plans to stuff their face until they explode as if they had a thin mint. And why not? How many days do we get to have such a spread? When else do people spend a whole day cooking food?
It is a big task, but that’s what my wife and I set out to do. We were celebrating it with just ourselves and our son. We’re not chefs, but we are good at following directions. So, it became our mission to make a great Thanksgiving meal in 24 hours. That may sound like a lot of time for some people, but we are not that experienced when it comes to such a meal as this. It is almost like Dinner Impossible.


To help us out, we had a “whiteboard” of things to accomplish in the allotted time.

As you can see, it is a lot to do, but we accept the mission. Luckily for us, we had the turkey defrosting an additional 24 hours so that we won’t have turkey on a stick. The bird was a heavy bastard at 17 pounds. It is a lot for a family of three, but believe me, I will be tearing up that white meat in the following days. I keep getting an image of myself with bunches of white meat in my mouth and shaking it side to side like a wild dog.


For the past three years, my wife and I have been making Thanksgiving dinner. We got our turkey recipe from the almighty Alton Brown. We caught the Good Eats: Romancing the Bird episode and downloaded the directions from the Food Network website. This was the first time I ever heard of brining a bird. That’s when one leaves the turkey soaking in brine overnight. After trying that technique the first time, we never looked back. I would seriously recommend it for anyone who never tried brine.


Now the brine doesn’t look like it would be appetizing. In fact, I was going to make a joke about irregularity, but I’ll take the high road and just say that the brine works when it comes to taste.

No Thanksgiving would be complete without the traditional cranberry sauce, and our meal was complete. For the past five years, we swore off cranberry sauce in the can and made our own. However, our sauce seems to have multiple personalities because we never have the same recipe. I’m not sure if my wife constantly wants to try new recipes, or that she can’t keep the recipe in a safe place. Um…maybe I should stop telling her to file our important documents.


Oh yeah, one more point on making cranberry sauce: I don’t know why but I love hearing the berries pop in the pot. I get a kick out of it. It’s the little things that count.

A new addition to the feast is a green bean casserole. It’s green beans with some sort of white sauce, topped with frizzled onions from the can. We got the idea from an episode of Unwrapped with Marc Summers.

green beans

Ugh! From the looks of this, I’d think Mr. Summers had some sort of acid flashback of Super Sloppy Double Dare when he mentioned this dish. I can see this stuff coming out of the big nose when looking for the red flag. No worries though. The casserole was tasty when done and we may make it again.

Another staple of my traditional Thanksgiving is the yams with the marshmallows on top. It’s the same kind Jon’s grandmother made on Garfield’s Thanksgiving. Lots of people make this for Thanksgiving so there’s not much to mention.


I will say this though; I totally totally wish that these marshmallows were of the Stay Puft brand. I’m a huge Ghostbusters fan and wish I could officially say that Stay Puft was part of my Thanksgiving.

marshmallow man

Nobody steps on a church in my town, so now I will eat you for that!

Ok, this post is starting to drag on more than Indiana Jones and a truck, so I’ll skip the baked macaroni and get to the last thing: The Stuffing! I never actually made stuffing for Thanksgiving before. In the past I have eaten good stuffing, so I had an idea of what extras to put in it. I added chopped apples, onions, celery, sausage, gizzards, and Craisins. I was laughing insanely when mixing the extras while the townsfolk were trying to break down my front door while carrying pitchforks and torches in order to destroy my abomination of a creation. Luckily for me, they finally realized that it was Thanksgiving and made a beeline to the supermarket. Man, some people can be so touchy. Stovetop isn’t that bad!

stuffing mix

This was my mix before I added the stuffing. It came out excellent.

Finally, the time to eat arrived. We put all the dishes together to take pictures of our dinner. For the most part, everything was perfect.

food 1

food 2

food 3

Our only mishap happened with the pie. We set the pie to cook in the oven, which should have took an hour. With that time, we went to the liquor store to buy some rose wine since we heard it went well with turkey (we also had Sam Adams). When we got back, there was a burnt smell in the air. I opened the oven and saw a black pie. There goes the dessert.

If our dinner was part of the show, Dinner Impossible, we would have failed miserably. We sat down to eat at 7:20pm EST. We would have been getting our heads kicked into the ground by an angry, hungry mob before we finished cooking. Good thing it was just my wife, son, and I. To tell the truth, I enjoyed it.

corbin 1

corbin 2

I’m used to going to a large family event for this holiday, but it didn’t work out this year. Still, I couldn’t imagine this Thanksgiving turning out any better than spending time and being thankful for my own family. Either that or I’m just a sentimental bitch.


4 Responses to “Thanksgiving Dinner”

  1. kristiane Says:

    yum. I had a great thanksgiving dinner with the fam, but we seemed to skip much of the traditional food this year. No good. I had no corn or sweet potatoes.
    Excellent spread, my friend!

  2. In10Words aka "Galileo" Says:

    I really wanted to hear about the Baked Mac & Cheese. I could do without the green bean casserole. Can’t stand that stuff.

  3. Will Says:

    That has to be the cutest little kid I have ever seen. Love you site!

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